True Relationship

Today I heard a very interesting incident during the morning Bhagvatam class. Once on of the western disciples of Srila Prabhupada was staying at Mayapur. She was a young lady in her twenties with a little daughter. Her seva was to go buy groceries and other related ingredients from the market (which was quite far and required her to go by boat to Navdeep market) everyday and cook for Prabhupada. She went to the temple cashier and asked for money for her conveyance and the goods. Now as we all know and is still prevalent not only in Bengal but almost everywhere in India, there are two fares, one the local fare (for local people which is btw the fair price of everything) and other the fare for westerners or foreigners (which is minimum 5-6 times the local fare).
Being a westerner this lady had to daily fight with the rikshawala, boatman and even the shopkeepers for the fair price. Not only that since she had a small child and the cashier didn’t give conveyance for her, she had to fight for her too, bargaining. This caused her daily anxiety. However it was seva and she did it. Not just that after coming back and being a westerner she was not familiar with Indian cooking , she used to hear Prabhupada telling her that someday the spices were not right, or the salt was less etc.

She was facing difficulty and felt that no matter what her efforts were she was not able to do her job, perform her seva properly. She began to feel that she can never do it. One day she decided to tell Prabhupada that she will not do this service anymore, as she is unable to do it perfectly and maybe he should assign her a different service. The day she was about to tell Prabhupada, Prabhupada had some of his God brothers visiting him and asked her to cook for them as well. Finding this an urgent situation and emotional as well she thought I’ll do it today and then tomorrow will speak to Prabhupada. She cooked for them and went to serve them. She was nervous, as it is not looked upon well for a Sanyasi (Prabhupada) to take service from ladies, that too someone so young. She was aware that Prabhupada’s God brothers disapproved of this and so she covered her face entirely in her sari while serving. One of the God brothers objected and spoke to Prabhupada regarding the same. Prabhupada replied that, “Yes I am taking service from a lady, however she is my disciple and she is so dedicated to her Guru that she would be willing to cut her throat for me and I would be willing to do the same.”

When she heard this she was in tears, never had she expected this sort of appreciation, she never thought that her service was so appreciated and acknowledged by her Guru Maharaj…

Hearing this incident touched me, Srila Prabhupada , was so exalted that he was already beyond the realms of this material nature, he didn’t differ his disciples as male, female and other than that he again displayed what true love, devotion and surrender meant. I mean their relationship was so spiritual and purely a connection between the souls with Krishna as the centre. Isn’t that the kind of dedication we look for in any of our relationship? I know I do, be it friendship, family or Love. I always strive to give my 100 percent and full dedication. I guess I have always been too (abnormally) passionate. (You know driven by mode of passion) I know we say there should not be any expectations in love and for me it is not exactly an expectation, but in general that should be the spontaneity in any relationship. I always believed in that, even before coming into Krishna Consciousness. Its so ironic, such thinking in this world is considered immature. Whereas a person who has been betrayed in life especially in relationships is considered wise and experienced and is looked upon with great respect. People exemplify them and expect us to learn from it. At every moment we are taught not to trust any relationship. There is no such thing as love. I guess its true too, because in this material conditioned world, it holds true almost 99.99%. And the only 0.01% where it holds true is only when its spiritual and connected to Krishna. Like that of a Guru and disciple or what we have for Krishna. I mean even that is difficult to achieve. It is not even applicable for other devotees. Its sad. But then this is Kalyug. It’s the trait of Kalyug. Today even the relationship between a bonafide guru and disciple (from the parampara) is not that strong. Btw I realised that my abnormal passion(is worth only if its for Krishna or serving him directly or indirectly.I heard another incident in today’s class related to Prabhupada.

Once Prabhupada wanted one of his devotees to go and preach in Japan. He asked him repeatedly. However this devotee was not only hesitant but was not agreeable to leave everything and go to Japan to preach. He kept refusing. Then finally one day Prabhupada told him that if he goes, then at the time of his death, Prabhupada would make sure that he would personally come and take him to Krishna. And then he agreed to go. The devotee left this world some five years back…Haribol. With his faith in his guru and Krishna am sure Prabhupada personally took him and kept his promise. :) Its just so beautiful this special relationship….

I would only wish all my relationships are as special and I realise they can be only if its connected to and centralised with Krishna. Which is why its important to bring your family and friends in the path of Krishna Consciousness. Sometimes its difficult and many times impossible, however we should remember (and this I am putting here to remind myself too, during my anxiety and frustrations) that we are only means. Its upto Krishna finally, whom He wants to follow this path. ‘Govind Ichcha’!

You know being so under the influence of Maya, its again my selfishness, to pursue and try and make people around me to come into Krishna Consciousness. Its beneficial for them no doubt but its still my love for them, plus the added bonus of my own purity. Because talking to them and insisting on following this path, keeps me and my wandering restless mind too in check. Its for my purity. It makes me understand the philosophy and Krishna better. I know I am selfish, I really don’t want to be, I want only pure thoughts and pure love and devotion for Krishna. Its difficult I agree, but together we can.

So tell me, today in your life, do you have any relationship, where forget you being confident of someone willing to cut their throat for you, but you are sure that when the situation demands you would be willing to do the same for someone?

It’s a thought, what you need is to be honest to yourself, you don’t have to tell me. ;) (and by this I don’t mean the stupid sentiment of suicide out of ignorance and depression without proper reasoning and thinking) Wouldn’t you want a true relationship? Its my personal experience, even little love and devotion, trust me by little I mean is almost nil compared to the reciprocation Krishna gives in return. Really he is so loving and merciful, that even if we use our love for him for personal gain, he reciprocates a million times. He is just waiting to shower all that sweet, beautiful love with his arms wide open. Yet we are sceptical and doubtful if we should pursue it. We are still weighing our options. I am sorry to say that in this life we are so conditioned (especially me) that we can’t help but have conditions to everything, including love. I know there are certain relations in my life that are close to if not this pure. But then again they wont count because I am not free from fear or doubt for them. But still I want that Friend and Family to know, that I cherish and value it a lot and if we continue to advance in Krishna Consciousness together, the bond would only grow stronger and love exponential. It would become a spiritual relationship, a true connection of the souls. (which would be even better than the connection between the subtle body, i.e the mind and thoughts)

Hare Krishna!

Being true to oneself

Saying Yes when we mean No- Well do you find yourself doing this often? I guess most people do. I believe its not healthy, because mostly we would be agreeing to do something we don't want to and then begrudgingly doing it. The worst would be that we are so used to giving in and agreeing that we might simply forget what we really want or who we really are. We can't please everyone or avoid difficulties by avoiding the truth of who we are--though we are not the body, we have to acknowledge its nature. However this doesn't give us an excuse to avoid our duties or responsibilities or abandon the correct path in life. But its important to be honest to live a genuine life peacefully. There are already so many miseries in this material life, our personal mental agitation with ourselves on account of not accepting who we are will only multiply miseries

Besides it makes more sense that people accept us for who we are from the beginning because the truth cannot be hidden forever and the earlier its revealed the easier the acceptance is. Doesn’t it make sense? If we give a person an image of something for a long time and later he finds that, that’s not who we really are, not only it becomes impossible to for him to accept this sudden change but also the feeling of betrayal, makes it harder to forgive and accept. Besides in all relationships one grows accustomed to the traits and nature of the other and accordingly nurtures the relation. This is how the bond grows stronger with time, which is why its important to give our true picture from the beginning of the relationship, as later, it would require not only to break the bond with our not-so-true personality but also develop a new one with out true one. Does this make sense?

You know I had read something similar on this topic and I had myself been thinking on the same lines, but I just realized earlier I had mentioned about ‘us not being the body.’I think I need to explain this further, even here I am presuming that my readers are already convinced that we all have a soul and are not just this body. (Incase of any comments on this, please mail me or leave a comment so we can have a separate discussion on the same.)As mentioned in my other blog, causelessmercy besides this material body, we have a subtle body.
Our subtle body consists of the mind, intelligence and the false ego. Beneath these two coverings is the actual self, the soul. The material body is given up at the time of death when you accept another gross material body according to the state of your consciousness at the time of death. The subtle body goes with you birth after birth until you become completely free from its clutches and go back to the spiritual sky for reviving your original spiritual form. The gross body is given up at the end of each lifetime in exchange for a new gross body either as a human being, a plant, or an animal. And the subtle body travels with you through your millions of births until it is finally given up at the time of your spiritual emancipation.
Frankly when I read this I got scared, so this means that if I am evil, does it mean that in my every birth I would be evil, because I would have the same subtle body which after all is responsible for my personality and general traits. Then I was told that this subtle body however is constantly being influenced by the three modes of nature. (Mode of goodness, mode of passion and mode of ignorance)
You can understand this better from the following verse in Bhagvad Gita (BG) (please click on the link to read not only the verse, but its purport for better understanding)
"Even a man of knowledge acts according to his own nature, for everyone follows the nature he has acquired from the three modes. What can repression accomplish? There are principles to regulate attachment and aversion pertaining to the senses and their objects. One should not come under the control of such attachment and aversion, because they are stumbling blocks on the path of self-realization." [BG 3.33-34]
But you know after reading this I still had the doubt as to how will then I ever find liberation of in my case Krishna. You could say by mode of goodness. True but there are so many religious practices in mode of goodness these days and even morals make some people follow the mode of goodness, however all that assures is the better heavenly planets (swarg- which is what mostly everyone aspires) but I want the ultimate and Krishna is the ultimate. There is such a simple answer to that too. “Govind Iccha” ie Krishna’s wish or his mercy directly or through his devotees. Which is why its very important to let anyone and every living entity hear or say once the name of Krishna. The holy name of Krishna is non-different from him, only then they would be assured to find their way back to him.(ofcourse most of you would say we don’t really want to find our way there, but if you are reading this blog then you are already trapped as you have read his holy name, seen his picture and are a part of my prayer so well if not in this life, in some you will definitely take up Krishna Consciousness and go back to him. ;) )

But then what can we do on our part to speed up the process. You know we suffer so much in this material world that I can bet at some point or the other in our life or for that matter in this Kalyug, (some point today itself) we wished, is there no end to this? Can’t there be eternal peace and happiness? However, that is generally not to be. We only gradually spiritual awaken, though we have an ocean of theory to give us a direction, and a community of fellow travelers (devotees of Krishna) to give us support. In the mean time, most of us need to address the reality of our desires and attachments, and work through them. Many devotees have tried to ignore them, and fallen away from the path to pursue their material desires , what one devotee rightly refers to “ Karmic Mission”. Many people say to me, there are so many restrictions, we wont be happy suppressing our natural feelings. But what I want to say is that is a big misunderstanding. No we are not supposed to suppress our feelings or restrict our desires.( Ironically its our desires that has put us in this position in the first place) Most Vaishnavs follow the four regulative principles ( No illicit sex, No meat eating, No intoxication, No gambling) but then they are not forced ever. Isn’t it commonly observed if someone we love likes something, and we love that person so dearly that we are willing to do anything to please him/her. Similarly devotees follow these principles to please Krishna. Because that’s the ultimate aim. (However in this age, even love is difficult to explain, because within the conditioned material life love is more or less a business deal, an exchange of services highly intoxicated with selfishness, Ego, pride and lust. I know this because I myself have been a part of this material love and a promoter too) Its absolutely different from spiritual love.

Coming back to my point, to overcome this conditioned nature, we can make it our friend by using our occupational and family necessities in Krishna's service. We have to serve Krishna with the help of our mind and senses, not turn them off and deny/suppress them. What is the cause of bondage--attachment--is also the cause of spiritual elevation. Material attachments can be dovetailed and used and thus gradually given up, or they can bind us take another birth. We want to ultimately become attached to Krishna. (i.e his service and his devotees, that is why a smart solution is to make people (who are non-devotees) we are attached to a devotee. ;) )

"One must deliver himself with the help of his mind, and not degrade himself. The mind is the friend of the conditioned soul, and his enemy as well." [BG 6.5] (please read its purport too at this link)

Its about time we accept and search for out true identity which is different from our gross material body and subtle body- Our soul and its relationship with Krishna. And in this enlightened state of consciousness we will be very happy and satisfied resituated in our true identity. This happiness is millions and billions of time greater than the temporary sense of happiness or rather a solution we find by enacting as to what seems to work or put off the problem for the time being. It always better to find permanent solutions than last minute disaster management.

Phew I hope this made sense to someone, and for putting to practice what I just wrote, I have been craving for some hot jalebis all afternoon, so without repressing my desire, I buy them from this real famous sweet shop, but to make it a permanent blissful experience I offer it to Krishna first. And mmmm… the prasadam, let me tell you another secret, Radharani makes every offering perfect for Krishna, so it out of the world, and free from any Karma. Hehe more on this later, my jalebis are here … :D

Hare Krishna!
Isn’t life blissful, eat, sing, dance, make merry and be loved tremendously?
PS- Don’t say no when you want to say ‘Yes’ either ;)

Radhe Radhe!

Peace and Happiness

I realised I have so many well wishers. :) There is someone who keeps praying that I find peace and happiness in life. I guess I was not convincing enough when I said I have it and it just keeps multiplying and will do so hopefully with Krishna's Mercy. (Maybe I could not convince because I am still illusioned to quite an extent with material Maya and am not spiritually pure. However I aspire to be a true devotee, maybe in some life I will...)

However these blessings and love of Krishna and devotees are so blisful, it makes me want to share it with everyone and especially the one who plays a vital role in my finding true peace and happiness. You know the heart just keeps wanting more and more of the best things in life and I want to share them with everyone especially the best people in my life. :D

So the following words are not only for you all and this person, who seeks peace and happiness for me and himself, but also for a friend of mine who is addicted to poison (we all are addicted to poison in this material world mostly psychological, but in his case its physical):

Why drink poison when you can be tasting nectar at every minute? I've been blessed with a nectar so sweet and plentiful that there's enough of it for everyone throughout the entire universe to drink unlimited quantities of it at every moment constantly relishing the most sublime taste. Seeing a world around me in which practically everyone is miserable, I am striving to fully dedicated my life to share and distribute this nectar. And I am happy to say it is working even with my small lazy efforts. However as the saying goes...'one can only bring horse near a well, you cant make him drink.' Therefore, I am inviting everyone that why should you prolong your suffering in this material world for even one day longer? Immediately take up the pathway of Krishna consciousness as chalked by the greatest spiritual masters in the history of the universe. Just taste this nectar and You'll have a great life! Radhe Radhe!

Chant :

Hare Krishna Hare Krishna, Krishna Krishna Hare Hare

Hare Rama Hare Rama, Rama Rama Hare Hare!

Spirit of Mumbai….Vaishnav Spirit! :)

Well this is something interesting and really zestful….

Only local train passengers in Mumbai will know how helpful commuters try to be...... Last week, a hapless victim fell prey to the over enthusiastic Bombay's local train commuters. Our hero, a man from Pune, wanted to go to Matunga, but as luck and trains would have it, boarded a fast train not halting at his destination. He panicked on realising his mistake but by then the local had started moving. On seeing his plight, a sympathetic co-passenger decided to come to his rescue. It seemed that he had been commuting by that particular train (6:03pm Kasara Fast) for the past 6 years and had noticed that the train always slowed down just before Matunga station and crawled at a snail's pace while passing through it. He told the man to jump out of the running train as it slowed down and that with a little bit of fleet-footedness, he would make it safely on terra firma. However, knowing the man's inexperience, he added some words of caution: "Keep running the moment you jump or you'll fall. Just keep running." He stressed the word "running" lest the man not know the laws of motion. The train did slow down just before Matunga station and at the prompting of his mentor, our hero jumped out of the train and started running as if all hell had broken loose. What he didn't realise, of course, was that he was running parallel to the direction of the train instead of running away from it. Meanwhile, the train slowed down further, so that the man was running faster than the train. In the process, he reached the door of the next compartment and the footboard commuters there pulled him in thinking he was trying to board the train! To his agony, the train picked up speed and sped past Matunga and his new co-passengers started to congratulate him on how lucky he had been, until he told them that they had actually undone what he had done with great difficulty. Those standing at the door of his "ex-compartment" had witnessed the whole drama and just couldn't stop laughing at the poor man's situation, while he grinned sheepishly!!

I mean I could write a saga on such hilarious train incidents, some of them are really moving, some disturbing and a lot very amusing. But this one just gave me this thought..... that just like the Mumbai spirit, I hope and pray to all Vaishnavs and devotees that in their association they show the same mercy and enthusiasm and help me board and most importantly remain boarded in the train to Goloka Vrindavan ;) , even if I try and board off it (due to my material bondage) and if by mistake I succeed to board off, they should similarly lift me back on board…Haribol!

Radhe Radhe!

A Really cute thought...Butter Thief!

Krishna, really relishes butter and he simply loves home made butter his gopis made...and stealing it and taking only made it so much more pleasurable, especially for the gopis. :) I just remembered sometime back, I had heard, HH Gaurgopal Prabhu say in one of his lecs that through our sincere love, humble attitude and determined devotional service we need to churn our hearts and make them loving and soft as butter...Only then Krishna will come and steal it away.... :)

Hare Krishna! I pray atleast I am able to start the churning of my malacious heart and be blessed with all the wonderful devotees and Guru Maharaj and Srila Prabhupada, then maybe someday I'll have that butter ready.... and he'll lick it away. :D Jai Nitai Sachinandan!

The Blue Umbrella

Last evening was a weird one, I had planned a few activities for myself and was on schedule however I just thought lets watch tv for a while. I knew that sometimes a while can turn out to be hours but then I was hooked. Just switching between channels I came across this title “Blue Umbrella” a movie on some channel for kids. I found the title so intriguing that I decided to postpone my activities, take a break and watch the movie.

Now I am not sure if any of you have seen it, in a gist it’s a story of a little shepherd girl who lives in a hill station and finds herself a very beautiful blue Japanese umbrella which gets her a lot of attention and admiration, not only from localites but also from tourists. Despite the attention, it’s the sheer company of the umbrella keeps her blissful. It was like a person itself to her. Now there is another character, who is a local snack shop owner and is known for tricking people into getting their valuables of a much higher value by tempting them or giving credit on the stuff he sells. He has taken quite a fancy for the umbrella and even inquires its cost from the market. He finds that it’s a rare Japanese make and is worth around Rs.2500/- (which is a lot for them) and would have to be brought from the next metropolitan Delhi. He tries to lure the girl in all possible ways but she doesn’t relent into his persuasions. One day the umbrella goes missing and hell breaks loose. The girl has lost her everything… she doesn’t eat, sleep, smile.

Ok well if interested you better see the movie, its got a good direction and excellent narration, and plagiarizing the story wasn’t really the intention of this post.

As I was watching the movie, as usual I placed myself in the protagonist (or atleast who I thought was the protagonist (little girl)) place and could somehow relate to her. I mean we all have our blue umbrella’s in life. Even though we value it a lot but there are time we might loose it due to our negligence. I mean it could be anything or anyone for that matter. I was thinking the pain and agony is the same, because our attachment was of the same nature. We can’t really argue that it was only an object, loosing a person would have been worse. It has had the same affect on the person who lost it. I know I have lost my blue umbrella, and it became even more important for me to see the movie to its end to find a solution to it.

The story simply marvelled me. I thought it was a predictable one and even though it was to most extent the essence left me surprised and thinking about it. I then realised it was just a story and I was desperately trying to find meaning in to it, a solution in my life that I found the movie and especially its end inexplicable. But now to think of it, in many ways it was the most practical end I guess. I was still sitting and pondering over it, when my mom came and reminded me of my chores. While we were at them, I asked mom about the meaning of the story. Lol its been ages after I have asked my mom to explain a story to me. It felt good. :D She although could tell me the most obvious thing and shrugged it off, saying just accept it and get back to making the garland’s for your Krishna.

Then suddenly it struck me….Yeah, Krishna…My blue boy. I have the painting hanging right over my head, and he was smiling at me. Sigh! I life, you might loose hundreds of blue umbrella’s even though it might seem the world’s end but then there is only one Blue boy to the rescue. Never loose or forget the Blue Boy…because he is the panacea to everything. (well for those really looking for solution, medicine) else with him in the picture, no blue umbrella, no matter how gorgeous. How precious, it would be just some filthy slime in front of the Wonderful, fun-filled, loving Blue Boy…Krishna.

Hare Krishna!
PS- You really need to see the movie, or ask me later to mail in detail the story to understand my state of mind and what exactly I meant or trying to portray with this post. Even better am sure it will have some nice reviews if you google it.

A Thankyou prayer on this wonderful morning... :)

Lord Krishna has designed this material world and everything related so perfectly, taking care of the most intricate minute details, that it leaves no doubt that there is definitely a creator and not just a chemical locha as so-called scientists claim. It also confirms that the creator himself would have to be absolutely perfect and self-sufficient and satisfied which confirms the essence of most Vedas. :)

Now the particular detail I had in mind was the gift of forgetting. It really is a gift more than a problem as many of you might see it. If we remembered everything then it would have been impossible to be sane and live normally. Imagine all the pain and all the loss, not just in this birth but in our past. All the suffering and worst of all our mistakes and repentance (it’s a good thing in a way to remember that so mistakes cant be repeated however then it would be very difficult to forgive oneself or believe there is hope for forgiveness and a bright future with Krishna. :)) Infact this power of forgetting is so beautifully designed that the memory lasts for just as long as it is required to be.

Lol which reminds me how he made mother Yashoda forget when she peeked in his mouth and his energy revealed his truth. He immediately made her forget to restore that loving relationship with his mother, else she would be in too much awe to genuinely love him as a parent, the vatsalaya rasa (loving relationship as a parent) is definitely higher than the loving relationship as a servant.

There are more than often days when before sleeping I am filled with so much remorse and mornings I feel I can’t face the world but then again feel a little better praying to Krishna. But this morning was different than usual. I had a beautiful dream, full of hope and a determined will to pursue the future hoping if not a second chance but if a similar situation arises I do not repeat my mistakes ever again and if Krishna is really merciful will get redemption.

I pray to Radharani, to present my case and prayer to her beloved Gopinath. I am just very thankful for their causeless mercy which I never deserved. I pray I never forget your lotus feet and can remember and be completely devoted to that loving eternal relationship with Krishna and always be engaged in his service. :)